You Do Not Have to be Ellen DeGeneres to Be Inspiring

Foreward: Guys for the record, I adore Ellen.

With my recent “little” changes in life (i.e. leaving a corporate job to start my own business), I am constantly humbled by the support I am receiving. I know I have said it like a thousand times but it needs to be said. Not to toot my own horn but to remind us ALL of a few really key, mind blowing things. Ok mind blowing may be an exaggeration. Let’s say reverberating then.

Someone I have come to know through Facebook sent me a very endearing message. While this is not someone I have met in “real life”, I do believe in the power of connecting with people even if it’s in cyber space somewhere.  Anyways, he reached out to me today to tell me this:

Doesn’t mean much to you but I’m proud of you. Happy to see you chasing your dreams. Honored to call you a friend.

Ok so first things first… I do not think we should EVER diminish the value that our words have on someone else. We under estimate the power or impact we can have on someone else just by taking 4.3 seconds to type a genuine message. (Which also is the case with messages that are mean spirited. Pick your words carefully).

When we speak from the heart, the message is heard loud and clear. If I just got a generic message like “good luck in your endeavors” then yeah perhaps I would not have thought much of it. For anyone to take the time, even if it takes 4.3 seconds to do, it’s still 4.3 seconds that someone took to send love and support. Which I don’t care who you are, like me, you need it.

Which also leads me to my next point.  When you have news, share it. I know for many of us, we are private (as am I with certain topics and details). But it’s like there’s this idea of shared energy or something. When you are excited, happy, unstoppable, that is what you are putting out there and so that is what you get back. Energy is infectious and when you have things happening, I say share share share! The love and support you will receive in return will only manifest your dreams and ideas that much faster. I can tell you the more people I share my plans and accomplishments and hopes and desires with, the more open I feel. And so it is no wonder I am getting validation from the most unexpected people telling ME I am an inspiration.

Which leads me to my next point. I have to say, being told I am inspiring has a whole lot of pressure attached to it. Knowing I am a person of interest (guys I am kidding. My ego is not that big)… Seriously though, knowing that my choices and actions are inspiring anyone humbles me like nothing I have ever experienced. The pressure kicks in because I do have fears which are scary to be exposing. Like what if I do not pass my Personal Training certification after posting about it for 3 months?  Or what if I launch a business that that flops? How is that inspiring?

The thing is though, I do have those thoughts for like a split second (which yeah happens more than just from time to time), I have to remind myself that like the idea of shared energy, if I keep fearing it, I am putting it out to the universe that I will fail. Which is NOT an option. So I instead shift my thinking to I WILL  pass my certification (which will not just happen by luck. I will be putting in the time studying and getting prepared). My coaching business will be successful, fulfilling, magical and inspiring. It is all about mindset. There is no room for negative thinking.

I also am realizing from my friend’s message today that the idea of being inspiring is not about being perfect. Being inspiring means being real. It’s being honest. It’s being human. It’s ok to have triumphs and it is also ok to fall. Nobody is perfect and being inspired by anyone that is seemingly perfect is just disappointment waiting to happen. I am not pretending that I know exactly what I am doing. I know what I may do today. I do not even know literally what I am doing tomorrow. This is why I am inspiring people. I am truly taking a road to a destination that is somewhat lucid yet there is literally no playbook or road map to get me there. I am trusting in myself and timing and the universe to guide me. I put on my big girl pants every day (well except the days I need my neighbor to come over and kill a water bug for me) and I just do.  That is why people find me to be inspiring.

And another thing about that. We all have the ability to do what I am doing. I am no different than you. In fact, I am probably very much like you. It took me years and a whole lot of stress and anxiety to get to a point where I accepted that I needed to make a change in a really big way. It is just getting to that point that is separating me from you or anyone else. As my niece would say, I am being brave. You can too.

 

 

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Dear Universe: I Got This

Foreword:  Can I first take a minute to say THANK YOU? I have been confident in my decision to leave my corporate ­­job and start a new journey. I expected SOME support from my close friends and family. I had NO IDEA that the support would literally come from every single person I have talked to, interacted with and who have been following my posts (and last week’s blog). You would think that as an adult hearing another adult say “I am proud of you” would not give you warm fuzzies, but guess what? It sure as shit does. Having so much validation from everyone has not just humbled me, but has given me such a confidence boost. It is also keeping me accountable and motivated because I feel like this is not just my journey, but something bigger that is going to inspire many people.

Also I really need to work on an elevator pitch for what it is I want to do. For now, let’s just say a fitness coach.

I believe that many of us approach change with practicality. We like to have a backup plan, Plan B, planned out just as well as Plan A. So it is really not surprising that quite a few people have told me (upon learning that I am venturing into something very new, very different), “Well you have great skills and if your plan does not work out the way you want it to, you can always come back here or find another corporate job.” I am very grateful that I am respected and valued enough to have that option, yet I am not allowing myself to even entertain it, not even for one micro second.

I am a strong believer that what you put out to the universe is what you get back. So if I even tell myself or I tell someone else or I tell the universe straight up that I am ok with returning to a job similar to the one I am leaving, then I am essentially giving myself permission to not succeed at my journey ahead. I cannot give myself a fall back plan that  involves returning to a job that does not inspire me. I have to believe in myself and my abilities (and divine timing) that I am on the path meant for me. I have to believe that I CAN (and will!) succeed at my dream. I have to believe that I do not belong in a traditional corporate environment and that I should not ever go back again (unless it is because they want me to coach their employees for healthier living! #shamelessplug).

I have nothing but excitement for what is ahead of me, which if you know me, speaks volume. I am not someone who typically goes with the flow or just “trusts”. It has taken me a long time to get to where I am, and I am choosing to focus on the positive. By giving myself permission to return to the corporate life is like telling myself I may not be good enough to do what I want to do. I would never say that to a friend or my sister or a niece or a nephew that they “may” succeed. I would tell them, “Absolutely! You got this!” So why would I tell myself anything less?

I had an epiphany watching a recent Facebook live that one of my respected leaders at Pruvit (the company I am an independent promoter for) posted.  She talked about how when she herself chose to take a leap of faith to promote, she had a lot on the line financially. She really did not even have the money for the small investment to get started. She did it though, and she told herself that she would and HAS to sell the product she was investing in. And she did. Pretty damn quickly too.

When she was telling that story, I realized I had the complete opposite mindset when I started promoting. I told myself that the worst case scenario was that if I did not sell the initial batch ketones I had to purchase that it was just a little bit of money and no major setback. And guess what? It took me months to completely sell them. Why? Because I gave myself an out. I told myself “it is ok if I do not succeed.” And after hearing my leader talk and having many conversations this past week with many people about my sort seemingly crazy but admirable career change, I realized that I need to ditch that thinking, with ketones and with my future business. I need to tell myself that I HAVE to do this. And I will. I believe that 100%. And I have to do it without a backup plan or contingency thinking.

I also think that we give ourselves permission to not succeed because it is easier on our ego. It is far harder to give something everything we have and not succeed than it is to maybe give half our energy and fail. Because then, it’s like, “Well I didn’t really commit to it.” Or “I knew it was risky, so I’m ok that I did not do well.”  If I am walking away from a solid income and stability, why on earth would I want to take any chances that I cannot replenish that? Girlfriend would have to be crazy. Which I am not. I am practical and sensible, yes. And even pragmatic. In this scenario though, where it is my livelihood and more importantly my happiness and mental sanity, I am completely committing to this. I want to. And I have to.

Committing to something obviously is not solely a way of thinking. I still have a lot of hard work cut out for me. I have to commit every fiber of me to this. Probably just as importantly, I have to work on a little thing too called confidence. If I believe in myself and my plans, then others will too. (People snuff out doubt and weakness like hounds, and that just comes back around in the universe). For the first time in my life, career wise, I am being very brave. I have no room for giving myself an out, even if it is hardly detectable.  Instead, I will stay focused, stay positive, and hustle my buns off. Because there is a lot of amazing, fulfilling, beyond- my dreams success waiting for me.

Sometimes You Just Need a Kick in the Butt From the Universe

I have been waiting a long time to write this. Actually, I have been waiting a long time to post this. I have been writing this far before I even knew this post would be a thing. Because I have been manifesting for this to happen. I have been 100% believing that it would. I just did not know when. Or how. 

I am leaving my corporate job.

 

Microphone drop.

 

I have put it out there that I want to leave and have been mentally getting myself ready to do that. So getting the push to go has not been scary for me. It’s been liberating. I have known I would leave, I just did not know when or how. When I got the news I am part of a surplus, I felt gratitude and relief. It is so easy (and if we are honest with ourselves, how many of us are feeling this way?) to stay complacent and not act. Because to act is to go into the unknown. It’s to go into something that is seemingly less stable or unpredictable (but let’s be real, how many corporate jobs are truly secure anymore?). I have been dipping my toes in other ponds for a while and now the universe is giving me the push to GO ALL IN.

 

While I have been remarkably and surprisingly cool, calm and collected, when I really think about what I am giving up, I have moments of “what the F am I doing?” My entire career all my job choices have been made on two very basic things: stability and money. I was taught at an early age to never be without them so as soon as they were in my control (aka I started adulting), I made decisions based on that.

 

Yet, every time in my life I have accepted a new job, I always had this knowing feeling it was not right for me. I of course pushed those feelings down as far as I possibly could. Today though, I am at the point in my life where I simply choose to no longer ignore that. It will not serve me going forward.

 

I am a firm believer in timing. I should say that this life changing decision was not one I made on a whim or on a feeling. It has been years in the making. With the help of my spiritual healer, she has taught me to trust in myself, my abilities and the universe. To trust that I would be guided at the right time to make changes, and that until then I need not worry about it or proactively seek out whatever it is I am meant to do. I have spent years working on myself and overcoming my own demons and roadblocks. I have also manifested the shit out of good things to come my way because I have known in my heart of hearts that I was playing a role in my job that was not something I wanted or could sustain.

 

And so the day has come that I am going to start my transition into a new world. A new world of opportunity of positivity and validation. A new world of doing something that I know will have an impact on many people. I am finally being true to who I am and who I want to be. I have finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up!

 

For decades I have had so much passion for health and fitness. I am one of those people that actually freaking loves to workout (I know, weird huh?) I absolutely love talking about working out and I can’t really understand those people who do not love it. One of the great things about being an Independent Promoter for Pruvit is that it has forced me to broaden my network. Conversations I am having, regardless if people are interested in ketones or not, have lead to being inspired over and over again. There is no shortage of inspiration in this world when you take the time to hear other people’s stories.

 

I feel like ketones are my gateway drug to so to speak. It has given me a taste of that euphoria of helping someone feel all the feels. It has given me a taste of what it would be like to really listen to someone and understand what it is they need, or what they are missing. I am also starting to realize and understand that while I have that drive and grit to workout and to not shy away from it, not everyone does. There are endless valid reasons why people fear it. Or maybe they want it but they do not know where to start. Maybe they feel like a fish out of water at a gym, which I get because I am completely uncomfortable when I step into a Home Depot. And it’s like everyone there KNOWS I do not belong. And so I quickly find what I need (by find, I mean I have to have someone direct me) and then I get the hell out as fast as I possibly can. That’s how people feel about working out I believe if they have any kind of hang up or roadblock.

 

Or maybe someone wants to workout but they are overwhelmed by choices or they do not know what type of workout suits them. So instead of trying them out, they may not do a thing. Which by doing nothing is really doing something. We have choices and there are so many options out there. I want to be that person that helps someone find what they like so that they can make their dreams and goals a reality.

 

I want to help people stay accountable and be that extra support they need to become healthy and fit.

I want to do this because I know how amazing someone can feel if they take action. It is common and very easy to talk about wanting something, but never do it. Then as soon as you do, and you start seeing results, you ask WHY did I wait this long?
Between what I see myself doing and the skills I am fortunate to have learned over my current career are all lining up to make me kick ass at my dreams. I wish I knew what my “job title” is, but that will come as I work more on the business and marketing side of my journey. (Which p.s. I do not see myself being called a health coach. So for all you marketing geniuses, I am open for suggestions as to how to brand myself).

 

I always thought I would transition into a new career when I had every last detail sorted out and not a second sooner, but I am realizing I don’t need that to go all in. In fact, over just these last 3 days of talking to my colleagues about leaving, I am getting even more validation and support that I ever anticipated. I keep waiting for someone to tell me I am crazy or stupid or reckless. But guess what? Nobody has said that. It’s validation that because I am SCREAMING into the universe that I am more than ready to trust it, and that is what I am getting back. Nobody is trying to talk me out of it because it is meant for me to be taking the biggest leap of faith ever. Being open and honest not just with myself but with those I work with, interact with, friends, family, hairdresser, you name it is opening me up even more for what is in my power to have. The universe gives back what we give to it, and that is why I am more than confident in knowing I am making the right choice, the best choice, for myself.

If You Want It, Manifest It and Make It Happen

I have so many thoughts, ideas, and inspiration percolating in my little Beetltejuice sized head, IT IS INSANE!

I almost did not blog this week (and well I didn’t blog last) because I do not even know how to put on paper (figuratively speaking that is) what my thoughts have been. So I am going to do my very best to share with you where I am at because well, it has taken over my brain. And you should know.

The truth of the matter is I know in my heart that I am meant to be sharing more of myself and my soul with the world. I have so much to give to people that I am only now just really tapping into. (And for the records, ketones has had a big part in that. I finally am doing something where I am getting sincere thanks and gratitude relating to wellness).

I have spent A LOT of time networking over the last few months. Which sidebar, I must acknowledge and THANK all the amazing, supportive people out there. Facebook and social media can be a very powerful tool to connect you with people you would never otherwise have access to. And for that I am so grateful. I am finding validation and guidance from so many of you that I am fortunate to now be in the acquaintance of.

I saw the sign.

It’s no secret I am spiritual. I ask my angels all the time for messages before I go to sleep at night, and I always just expect they will be given in my dreams. That is not always the case. Often we get messages from unexpected people, strangers even. I was looking for guidance on well, what is my purpose in this world? I asked for a clear sign and I got it.  It took me a few days to realize it, but it was there, clear as day. It was in a chat with someone I recently added on Facebook. Signs show up in unexpected places and forms, but never discount them. (And it goes to show that even our angels and guides are keeping up with the technological times!) This sign has lit something in me to really change gears and follow my passion.

All signs point to…

My eyes light up when I talk about CrossFit, fitness and health. There’s such an adrenaline rush when physically working out and then there is also like this crazy mental stimulation when I get to relive and relate to other people.  I have always just thought it was a hobby for me. I am realizing though there is no reason I cannot do more with it than classify it as an interest.

I want to be the one that you go to when you are in a health rut and need someone to motivate you to reach your goals and dreams. I want to be the one who works with you to come up with a plan to get there. I want to be the one that you see as inspiring. I love hearing of your wins and successes and I also love being able to help you overcome challenges.

All signs point to I want to coach. I feel like I have actually known this on some level for years, but I have pushed it down. Far far down.

What I do not know…

What I do not yet know is what I need to do to get there. I have been researching taking different certification programs for coaching. I also should add that I have not yet defined what kind of coach I want to be. I am hesitant to call it a Health Coach because that could mean different things. Health coaches can vary from focusing on nutrition and weight loss to focusing on someone’s overall well- being to a slew of other awesomeness.  I also have been contemplating getting some kind of Personal Training certification to help me be more rounded and possibly able to advise or coach clients. P.S. I am open to suggestions on certifications and courses as while I have been searching, I have not yet found “the one”.

What I also do not know yet is what would my services be? I have gone to career coaches, for examples, whose sessions have varied. Sometimes they are discussions and advice to give me a plan as to how to handle a specific issue. Some have been with tangibles like giving me cards and exercises on developing Performance Plans for my team. So when I think about coaching, what is a session with a client going to look like? Is it to help people come up with a sustainable fitness plan? Is it therapy-ish style? Do I even need to know that right now? I suspect I will figure all that out the further deep  I go.

I suspect that my services may evolve as I learn more about coaching. I am grateful for all the leadership and communication trainings I have taken over the years because I am confident in my abilities to listen and coach. I have learned so much about the importance in choosing my words carefully and about guiding people instead of just immediately problem solving for them. I want to take these skills and apply it to more wellness coaching.

I may be in the early stages of piecing it all together or who knows? Maybe it is closer to coming to fruition than I realize. I am excited to start really jumping into this world to find my niche. I am ecstatic to share this with you as I always welcome the positive vibes I get from you.. So while I research and manifest, stay tuned.

 

 

 

 

Why Do We Need to Always Explain Why?

 

I have recently been struck with a realization that we find ourselves feeling like we need to justify gaps in our own lives to other people. Similarly, we feel compelled to explain “why” to people when really, it just is not their concern. It is like if we deviate from a plan or from what other people expect of us (even what we expect of ourselves), we feel like we need to rationalize it. I do believe though that our culture, our society, has the capacity to overcome this.

I know, you are thinking, “Tell me more, Missy.” I was having a conversation recently with a friend who is looking for her next career move. She took some time off from her last job, and so I asked her, “What will you tell companies if they ask why there is a gap in your resume?” She said simply, “I will tell them I took some personal time. The end.”  I pondered this for a moment as my brain usually wants more concrete answers. As we chatted more, I fully understood and agreed with her point. Why does she owe anyone an explanation? We are so used to always having to tell people a story when in actuality, it is not any of their business. For someone who is smart, accomplished, competent, likeable, savvy, why does she owe to anyone to explain a mere gap on her resume? Because  the truth is, LIFE happened. And specifically what that means, well that is really nobody’s business.

Throughout my career, I have always been cognizant of not having a gap on my resume. The truth is, I took some time off to do short term jobs a few years after college (and working my first real job in finance) because well frankly, I was 25 years old. I was unsure what I wanted to do.  I was young. I was disenchanted. And I wanted time to figure out where to go and what to do next. But no way in hell was I going to tell any potential employer that. I was far too worried they would view me as someone who was not motivated or ambitious or worse yet, a total flaky scatterbrain. Instead, I stretched the truth a tad and said that I worked for a family business for a year.

I remember going to interviews with my standard story. “I was living in Pittsburgh and I really wanted to move back home to New Jersey. The timing worked out as our family business was in need of some extra help.” That always satisfied the interviewer, and I did get a “real’ job once again when I was ready.

Looking back, as this was probably around 2004, maybe at that time, it was still expected that no gap go unexplained. Today though, I would like to think that our culture has changed.  I do believe there is a higher acceptance of understanding that just because someone went off course does not mean they have less to offer. I wonder if I were to interview for a job tomorrow with a revised resume that does not reflect a year of working at a family business (and oh my, instead has a gap!) that I could be blunt and just say, “Well I was 25. I was not really loving my job anymore.  My boyfriend moved to West Virginia. I didn’t want to be in Pittsburgh anymore and so I moved back home.”  I would  be surprised if at this point in my life  that my 25 year old self would really work against me. I have a few years (ok fine shut up, more than a decade) of experience since then that would more than make up for it.

What if I actually gave no explanation of the gap and simply said, “I took some personal time off. The end.” Would anyone would even blink an eye? And really why should  it matter if someone takes time off at 25 or 35 or 55? People have their reasons, which there is no limit to what those reasons could be. It is their reasons, their stories. Why should getting a job depend on them providing personal details to a complete stranger? People’s character and ambition should speak for themselves and overcome a gap.

And it isn’t  just jobs where we have this expectation of having to explain ourselves. It goes beyond that. Look at dating.  How many times have you felt (or heard friends express) the dread of having to explain why you haven’t dated in FOREVER? Why do we feel compelled to rationalize our single lives? Maybe instead of blaming it on long work hours or the city you live in is just the WORST for dating., you simply just say, “It just hasn’t happened yet.”  That is the truth and so is saying, “Because I am awesome and have yet to meet someone as awesome as I am.” You get my point. We have such a tendency to feel like less of a person when we feel as if we fall short of expectations, and that simply should not be the case.

The gaps and “need’ to explain go on and on. Why did you take time off before going to college? Why did you wait 5 years after you got married before you had a baby? Why did you wait 4 years before you had your second baby? Why did you wait so long to get married?

The reality is people feel compelled to explain themselves or their situation because of the fear of being judged. And another reality is that, we all want to know “why” because we actually do want to judge, bad or good. We want to know WHY because we are trying to assess if there is something shady that we must uncover. Did you not work for a year because you nobody wanted to hire you? Have you not dated in a while because you are bat shit crazy?  Did you not go to the happy hour because you are trying to make some kind of statement?  My point is it all feels very cynical. We make judgments and assumptions based on very little information.

And the ironic thing is, often when we have these gaps or chose to go against the grain, contrary to popular belief, we come back from them as better humans. We often learn so much about ourselves and about others that we never would  have gained had we stayed on a straight path. We gain knowledge and insight, even if the gap or break we took was due to something tragic or sad, we come back stronger and better. I encourage people to stop viewing gaps as something damaging. Start looking at them with respect and admiration.  Start appreciating what they can do for a person, for a soul. There is something to be said for life experience when we deviate from the expected.

 

When Your Car Breaks Down, Who Will You Call?

Friendships morph, grow and even dissipate over the years. Sometimes you struggle trying to stay connected to friends who are in different places in life, may it be marriage, parenthood or even geographically different.  Sometimes you have friends that you outgrow and sometimes even friends where you feel like you are trying to catch up to. Friendships can prevail though through all sorts of circumstances, ups and downs and changes. What is important to you when it comes to true friends? After 30 plus years, I have figured out what the definition of a true friend is to me. And yes, I am about to share that with you.

Let’s start with the fundamentals that have become my guiding principles. Being a true friend would be describing me as, “That’s Missy. The sassy, petite girl who works her ass off at the gym, is an amazing writer and the best aunt ever. And I am damn proud to know her.” Being a true friend is wanting to spend time together whether it is just the two of us or 20 of us. Being a true friend is accepting me as I am. Being a true friend is complimenting, encouraging, supporting and reinforcing  all the great things about me. Being a true friend is not taking one single bad experience and making a determination of my character. Being a true friend means listening, not just to what I say but to what I don’t say. Being a true friend means you know me so well that you can instinctively pick up on when something is not right with me. Being a true friend means knowing  that I brighten when I talk about my nieces and nephews, that fitness is a passion and that despite my own set of challenges, I have persevered.

I often think of who my true friends are in terms of putting together a guest list for my future fictitious wedding. The ones who make the cut are the ones that I know I will still be friends with 5 years and beyond from now. When I look back at big day’s photos, I want to see my friends who are still a part of my life. I do not want to invite people just to fill seats. I want friends who I am connected to. My true friendships have reciprocity of authentic and genuine love and respect.

Being a true friend is about the details and the little things. They show that you know what I need and when I need it. They show you know the little things about me that perhaps other people don’t. You do all of them with no judgment (and often a lot of humor). Being a true friend is sending flowers after my first CrossFit competition. Being a true friend is killing gigantic terrifying water bugs for me. Being a true friend is sending me a card for no occasion other than because you were thinking of me. Being a true friend is being my responsible adult after surgery and standing outside my first shower post-surgery to make sure I don’t have a “I’ve fallen and can’t get up” kind of situation.

Being a true friend is believing in the old saying “when you love someone set them free.” It takes a strong person to let a friend “break up “ with you so that they can work on themselves. It happens a lot where we need time to figure things out and reevaluate friendships. Sometimes in these breaks we learn that perhaps the friendship is not what we thought or wanted. But it also happens that we are reminded of all the reasons why we value that friendship. It shows character in both friends in the equation. It takes character to say “you know, I miss you and I want to reconnect.” It takes character for the other friend to understand their friend so well that they are willing to give that friendship a second chance.

Being a true friend does not mean I need to hear from you or see you every single day. I know who my true friends are and that when they do think of me, it is with fondness and love. It also means understanding that friendships go through ebbs and flows, and when there is an ebb, it does not mean you are any less important to me. Any one person only has capacity for so much at any one time. People’s priorities shift and ebbs are not necessarily a reflection that you are valued any less. Being a true friend means that you can handle those uncomfortable moments where someone is going to call you out on your shit and that you can get past differences that only make the friendship stronger. Being a true friend means understanding and respecting boundaries. (post on that here). Being a true friend means you can go five days or five years from the last time you saw each other, and it is like no time has passed at all.

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I also have recognized what being a true friend does NOT mean. Being a true friend is not based on the superficial. It does not mean first describing me as “you know, the cute girl with the great ass” (although to be fair, if you ever want to tell me anything along those lines,  I certainly will not stop you). It is not waiting to accept or decline an invitation until all other invitations are in.  It is not trying to “fix” me when I am not asking to be fixed. It is not spending time together in an opportunistic way. Being a true friend is not putting me down or making me feel less of myself. It is not making a judgment based on a single event. Being a true friend is not doing all the talking and never asking a question. Being a true friend does not mean that you necessarily know what my favorite color is or where I went to college or what kind of a car I drive.

When I look through pictures and photo albums (yes I really do have printed photos), I see so many people in them, most of who I do not necessarily even keep in touch with. Some I look at with disdain, some I look at fondly. Some I look at and I am reminded of a lifelong connection to. They are the ones who stand out to me. They are the ones I have met unexpectedly. They are true friends I have met in kindergarten, in college, at jobs, at the gym, at CrossFit, at running clubs, on vacations. Some I have instantly connected with. Some friendships have formed over time. No matter though how I met them, when I met them or where I met them,  they are my true friends because they all have hearts that are nothing but kind, pure, and just plain goodness. They have seen me at my best, and they have seen me at my worst. They are my true friends because they are the ones I want at my side. They are my history, my present and my future. They are the ones that like my nieces and nephews, make my eyes light up when I think about them. They are the ones that can make me laugh, make me think, make me humble, make me… Me.

5 Rash Trump Quotes that Get Under My Skin as a CrossFitter

 

Not even two weeks into the new administration and it is IMPOSSIBLE to escape hearing about everything the new “president” is taking away from us. He is, as many say, bad reality television at its finest.  And like so many of us, my heart breaks a little more every time I see or hear some outlandish article or post about him. I personally need a little comic relief from this reality we are in. In an effort to (obviously) poke fun at some of the most incredulous quotes and stupid, irresponsible comments that have come out of his mouth, I want to parallel it to why none of it would ever fly if it was said in respect to CrossFit

*Disclaimer: The quotes I am using in this post are in and of themselves in their intended context completely ridiculous, and I am by no means minimizing the reality we are in. For me, applying it to another subject (CrossFit which is near and dear to my heart) is like my own weird therapy for dealing with this twilight zone we seem to be living in.

  1. “Happy New Year to all, including to my many enemies and those who have fought me and lost so badly they just don’t know what to do. Love!”  (Twitter, 12/31/16).

    Aside from the obvious lack of sportsmanship, CrossFitters do not understand the concept of “enemies” or “lost”.  People who hate on us, sure they are misinformed, but we would never consider them enemies. In fact, we would never turn them away should they one day reconsider and want to try CrossFit. We having nothing but mad respect for everyone whether they CrossFit or not.

    Losing? No such thing in CrossFit. Even those who “lose’ a competition or are not at the top of the white board, they still win. CrossFit is a constant journey and regardless how someone does today, they are better than yesterday.  Not to mention, CrossFitters know what to do if they do feel like they did not quite hit their goals: they work harder. They fight back, not for spite but for themselves.

 

  1. “When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending the best. They’re not sending you, they’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists… And some, I assume, are good people.” (campaign speech, 6/15/15)

    Well then, I guess I workout alongside drug lords, criminals and rapists. Gosh, I need to go find another place to CrossFit because surely every person who comes to California from Mexico is a criminal. They never inspire, work hard, show humility or any trait of a good humanitarian. Get real, Trump.  For the better, they are every much a part of CrossFit as anyone else.

  1. “That’s one of the nice things. I mean, part of the beauty of me is that I’m very rich. So if I need $600 million, I can put $600 million myself. That’s a huge advantage. I must tell you, that’s a huge advantage over the other candidates.” (ABC news, 3/17/11)

    Does money get people further in life? That is highly debatable.  Is that even what lead to his presidential win?  Perhaps it factored in, but I digress.  When it comes to CrossFit, money definitely has nothing to do with how succesful an athlete is when it comes to hitting a PR or improving your Fran time. Not to mention, the funny thing is nobody gives a crap about what the person next to them squatting does for a living or how much their annual income is. Everyone is equal when they walk into a box. All CrossFitters want to see is hard work and a good a­­ttitude (ok and muscles). That is beauty. Period.

  1. “The only card [Hillary Clinton] has is the woman’s card. She’s got nothing else to offer and frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don’t think she’d get 5 percent of the vote. The only thing she’s got going is the woman’s card, and the beautiful thing is, women don’t like her.”

    Ok let’s talk about the woman’s card at CrossFit. Well in actuality it does not apply. CrossFit women hustle in every aspect of their lives, from training to working to being a mother to being a daughter to being a friend and everything in between. We do not come into the box expecting coaches to take it easy on us or train us simply because we are women.  They train us because we give a shit about our health and fitness. CrossFit women do not gain respect simply by setting foot inside a box either. We gain it by working our “women’s card” asses off, not by charity or pity.

 

  1. “How do you define leadership? I mean, leadership is a very strange word because, you know, some people have it, some people don’t and nobody knows why.” — “Larry King Live,” 1999

    Really, nobody knows why? Leadership is not mythical. It is not hard to grasp. It is not a mystery. There is no formula for leaders. It is not a gene you are born with or not. Leaders are leaders because they display integrity, honesty, transparency, humility, positivity. Leaders have foresight, kindness, compassion. They inspire. The list goes on. In CrossFit, it is no different. Leadership is not an “either you got it or not” kind of a thing. It is actually quite easy to define, emulate and identify. Look for the athletes who give it their all. Look for the ones who are cheering on their boxmates. Look for the coaches telling discouraged athletes, “Yes you can!” Look for the members who come in smiling, ready to face whatever is about to be thrown their way

 

I am sure if Trump were ever to read this post he would dismiss it as CrossFitters being­­­­­ “bad press”. If being bad press means being able to back squat more than his bodyweight, I will take it. If being bad press means being part of a united community, I will take it. If being bad press means being the best version of ourselves, I will take it. Trump can say whatever ridiculous things he wants to (and I am sure there will be no shortage in the years to come). We all have first amendment rights. The difference between him and a good CrossFit citizen is, we wouldn’t simply because we just do not think at all like him. We chOose to focus on being open to everyone and everything. That is what makes CrossFit so great. It is diverse in every way from the people to the programming to our abilities. We seek to inspire people, not divide them.