Six Types of People Who Will Suck the Soul Out Of You

Foreword: I was about half way done with this post when it dawned on me. I am sure I am not the first person to write about this topic. And so I googled it and sure enough, I am not. Fortunately, the ones I came up with I did not see on the half a dozen articles I found so at least there is that!

I know I am not alone in feeling like the energy around us recently has been out of sorts. It is almost hard to explain but if you have expereinced it, you know what I mean. And if you think I sound just bat shit crazy (which may be true), the important thing to know is that it sparked me thinking about energy. And often what we are picking up around us is not even ours. It may not even be that of someone standing ten feet from you, but it is coming from someone who orbits the same world you live in.

And as long as we let them orbit in OUR world, we are allowing their energy in. Which made me think long and hard about the types of people who we would no doubt benefit from saying adios to.

  1. The person playing the victimI have met people who have gone through some horrific shit yet when they tell me about it, they will be sure to say “It is ok. I do not want to live in the negative or let it take over my life. I am moving ahead and grateful for what I do have.” Those people, hold onto them. They will raise your vibrations and be that good energy you want. It is the people who do the opposite. The ones who are constantly complaining. The ones who repeatedly are being “targeted”. It is never anything they do. They cannot help that they have a mean boss, a mean neighbor, a mean co-worker, and mean friends. Everyone is always mean to THEM and they are just PERFECT. Yeah, right.

Those people, the victim people, they are exhausting and will suck the soul right out of you. Turn around and walk away. And do not look back. No matter how hard you try to be nice and to be a friend, they are always going to find fault in you. Because remember the last 10 friends they had they slowly divulged over time about how they wronged them? Well guess what, you are being primed for #11. And who the fuck wants that drama?

  1. The zero accountability person.

I almost did not include this one because well, I could easily write 5000 words on this alone. I am an adult though and I promise I can be concise on this point.

The zero accountability person is likely to also be the person playing the victim. Because when someone has a victim mentality, it is NEVER anything they did.  They are just innocently going through life being awesome, kind and selfless who just happens to have bad shit happen to them. All. The. Time.

There is a strong correlation to happiness and taking a long, hard look at ourselves.  Happiness is not just something that happens. And being on a quest for happiness does not entitle anyone to be a total jack ass to people or to self-sabotage.  Our quality of life is a reflection of owning the good, the bad and the ugly.

So if you find yourself around someone who never takes accountability, if you do not separate yourself from them, you are 100% likely to legit go crazy.

  1. The person who tries to talk you out of your dream.
    Going into fitness and coaching, I have gotten an unprecedented amount of support. I have had people who have questioned or raised concerns about elements that I may not have thought about. That I welcome. Please, help me think through details I may not have considered. That is cool. That is being a friend.

If I did though encounter someone who told me that I am absolutely insanely stupid to pursue this dream, I would obviously first punch them, and then start second guessing my decision. Crushing someone’s dream is demoralizing to say the least. We need to support each other.

Now, don’t get me wrong. If I told anyone that I was leaving my corporate job to become an exterminator, they would have laughed in my face. And rightfully so. I go into a 3 month trauma when I see a water bug so no way could I be an exterminator. A good friend, even if they do not agree with the dream, will at least try to understand what you are seeking. What is it you are missing that you want something else? If the dream is misaligned, they will help you find a more appropriate one without just quickly denouncing it.

  1. The Social Media public basher

You know the people who vacillate between extremes? Like one day they are posting about how much they love avocados and puppies and the next day they are bitching about their ex-wife and how she is stealing custody from you. Yeah, to me, when they go to that extreme, it is negative. And it is not that they are not in the right for how they feel but I do not always trust those who are not using sound discretion in what they post.  It is social media not an episode of “Judge Judy”.
Not to mention, if you see someone who is bashing someone openly and without tact, what makes you think you will never be in the hot seat?

 

  1. The person who gets all their Intel from Facebook (aka the gossip)

Ever have a conversation with someone who is catching you up on all these people you are mutually acquainted with? And you start wondering how is it that this person has managed to know so much about all these people? Then, in one of their mesmerizing stories, they mention they saw something that a friend of a friend of a friend posted about  on Facebook.

 

Move along, sister, move along.

 

  1. The ageist.

Disclaimer: I am the BIGGEST hypocrite for including this one. Full disclosure I am a total ageist (but I swear I am working on it!). I make fun of millenials any chance I get and am in total awe of anyone over 50 with a 6 pack. But having said that, I know it is not right.  And I am grateful for everyone who proves me wrong every single freakin’ day.

There is such a tendency to associate expectations based on age. Like nobody can possibly have their shit together before 30 and nobody possibly truly learns to love themselves until age 40. And 60 year olds should stick to crocheting and watching “Golden Girls”. (Ok bad example, those chis are the best. For all ages!)

 

Ageists will take self -imposed expectations and unfairly places them on others. “Anyone over 30 who is not married is hopeless” or “He is 25. He does not know what life is.” If you go to an ageist for advice, are they going to look at you fairly or are they going to make biased assumptions about you based on age? Just something to noodle over if you find yourself in the company of an ageist.

 

We all have dreams and we all have passions. We need to really consider the people around us and ask ourselves: are they inspiring us or are they draining us?

You Can Have Your Bad Juju: It’s All Rainbows and Unicorns For Me

Over the last few years, with a lot of help from my spiritual healer, I have truly started coming into my own. I have shifted my mindset as to who I am and who I want to be. I progressively find myself working towards being positive, optimistic, authentic and inspiring. (Spoiler alert: You will read those words repeatedly in this post). It has been a gradual journey and not an easy one. I have YEARS of being a glass half empty kind of girl that I have had to banish from my mind. I have come to understand, accept and embody that you get out of this world what you put in. When you are negative, cynical and disenchanted, then naturally that is what the world will give back to you. If you can stay above the darkness and immerse yourself in the positivity and happiness, then the universe is yours for the taking. This all ties into my new mantra (thanks to my wise healer), which is to do things and be around people that inspire me. It is a constant reminder of how to gauge situations and people so that I can live life to the fullest.

Timing is everything in this world, and so it is no wonder that I was introduced to Pruvit recently. (Stay with me here, I promise this blog is not meant to be a subliminal sales pitch for ketones. Oh wait, is it? No, no, really, it is not). Being part of their company and community, it feels like I have landed on the Mother Ship.  It has been my entry into the world of health and wellness from a very different vantage point. Yes, it is giving me so many amazing benefits like energy and clarity but even more than that, I feel like I have found my people. The culture of the company is so naturally aligned with my own personal mantras and philosophies that it gives me goose bumps.

It would be ironic and just wrong if for a company, or anyone for that matter, to be encouraging others to live a healthy lifestyle and not exemplify that themselves: physically, mentally and spiritually. Would you want to have a personal trainer who frequents fast food restaurants, smokes like a chimney and never workouts themselves? Of course not.  Nor would you want a trainer who complains nonstop about workouts or family or anything really. Negative is negative, and it contradicts living a healthy life.


Every call I have been on that Pruvit has hosted with the cream of the crop, the royalty of the business, they all echo the same message (and it is so simple that  it will blow your mind). Manifest what you want and put out what you want from the universe. Gravitate towards the positive and stay as far away from the negative and the hate as you possibly can. It is so easy, for example to do something as seemingly innocuous as posting something that can be off putting to others. Or to get intertwined in someone’s social media rant. (If you believe in energy like I do, then you understand how being on that level is just bad). So you just chose to NOT do that, and you find yourself naturally gravitating towards people who exude encouragement, good will and positivity.

Being part of Pruvit has given me this organic network of likeminded people. It encourages me to seek out and attach myself to people who do not let me live on the dark side. It is like this amazing support group that I did not even realize I was longing for until I received it. Having a bad day? No problem. We shake it off and move on. Didn’t convince one person to try ketones? That’s ok. Do not fixate on it and focus on the next person.

I want to make a really important distinction before I wrap this post up. It is one thing to have a bad mood, or a bad day. It happens to all of us where we find ourselves frustrated and complaining.  Those are moments. They pass. It is another thing to consistently be irritated, negative and cynical.  And take it from me, I used to have those attributes be my go-to.  I have spent most of my life assuming the worst in people and in situations, but as I mentioned earlier, after years of working on myself, I have let go of so much of that.  It accomplishes very little, and if anything, it gets in the way of reaching goals, success and most importantly, happiness.

I know I am not the first to write about being positive and not cynical (and I certainly will not be the last). I also know that we often have the best of intentions but those can be clouded by what we say or do. I undoubtedly am still on a quest to master this art as the more I practice it  the happier, more liberated I feel. I appreciate when I do have those dark moments that someone corrects my perspective. I need that. We all need that.  My challenge for you is to stay positive and bring people up with you.